We had met under odd circumstances. The city of Bombay was burning up in communal violence in 1992 . I was on my way back from work. The roads were deserted and few vehicles passed by. When he stopped his car asking me if I needed a lift, I was not sure if I should accept the offer. But then, the streets were not safe either.. So I accepted the lift. “A gentleman to the core” was the first impression I had of him. He drove quietly asking me for direction once in a while. It was funny, the silence within the car was not tension filled but sort of calm and reassuring. I watched his hands as they turned the steering wheel and changed gears. His confidence was very appealing. He dropped me off at the hostel gate and waited around for a while until the watchman opened the gate. “Take care” was what he said as he drove off.

Bombay always bounces back to business whatever be the problem that may have put it out of action temporarily. Within the next few days things started getting back to normal and I forgot about being stranded on an empty road and being given a lift by a stranger.

I met him a month later at a conference. He was one of the lead speakers. I sat among the other delegates wondering if I should speak to him during the tea break. I was not even sure if he would remember who I was. I was still wrestling with these thoughts in my mind when I found him at my side. “Hello. Hope you are alright ” was what he said. A soft voice, a voice that I noticed for the first time. I smiled at him nodding my head. “Hi, I am Vikas” he said extending his hand towards me. “Kamini” I said as I shook his hand.

After the conference got over, he invited me for coffee at a restaurant nearby. I don’t know what it was about him that was so interesting. But I accepted. I, who never went out with any man anywhere accepted to have coffee with a person who was a virtual stranger! After coffee, he dropped me back at my hostel. At the hostel gate, we exchanged cards.

He called me  a couple of times at the office. But the office line was not exactly conducive for a long conversation. So, I gave him the hostel phone number f . He always called late in the night after 10.00 PM. We spoke for over an hour. His voice was soft – almost a whisper. It was nightly ritual. I would sit in the mosquito ridden reception area wrapped up in a shawl waiting for that call..! The girls at the hostel were very curious as to whose calls I was waiting up for. I was not exactly what you would call, a very pretty woman. In all my thirty years, no man had even looked at me.! I was confused as to why he was interested in me! What did he see in this stupid ordinary person called “me”?

It was not just phone calls, we used to meet for lunch during working days. I longed to spend weekends with him. But he said that it was not possible. I don’t know why I did not realize earlier that he might be married. Actually I stumbled upon this fact one day when I saw a picture in his wallet- a picture of him with a beautiful woman and a child! I did not have to ask who they were. I knew now and he knew that I knew! We never spoke about this ever!

People may think that he had cheated me into a relationship with him without telling me that he was married. But I think that it is unfair to blame him because he had not exactly lied to me. We had just not discussed this.. it had never occurred to me to ask if he was married and anyway it did not make a difference to me at that point.. maybe if I had known it on the day he gave me a lift or on the day of the conference it might have been different.

I looked again at the phone. Was it my imagination or was the receiver slightly off the hook? I went close to it and checked. No, it was placed properly. I looked at my watch- almost nearing midnight. “ Please,,, please call” I whispered aloud! I wanted to call him. But he had told me not to.. and besides, how would I explain who I was if someone else answered the call..?

My eyelids were feeling tiered. They wanted to close after all the crying that they had been doing over the last hour.. I wanted to go back to my room and sleep. But I was afraid to go – what if he called and I was not around? Nobody was likely to answer the phone in the reception at midnight!

What if? What if?..yes there were many possibilities but none that applied to me. I curled up on the settee in the reception exhausted and closed my eyes… Tomorrow was but another day- I know he will surely call!

( A tale set in the pre cell phone era when hearing a loved one’s voice was not just a palm or finger tip away- a time when one had to get past unwanted persons before  hearing  that  voice that one longed to hear!)

Dr. Achyuta Menon looked up from the book he was reading as he saw the autorickshaw  stop outside his gate.. When he saw who it was he got up from his chair, switched on the porch lights and  opened the door in readiness for her to get in.

“ My God, you are completely drenched ! . Go and change or you will fall sick” he told her.

“Uncle, where is Aunty?” she asked ignoring his suggestion of a change of clothes.

“ I am here. What happened ” said Indrani coming in from inside the house

“Oh Aunty… I saw him!” she said throwing herself into Indrani’s arms

“Come on now, calm down. Lets go upstairs and I will hear your story after you have changed into dry clothes” said Indrani.

Dr. Menon, had never understood this ability of his wife’s  to get anyone to do as she wished.. Imagine, he had just explained to the girl about the consequences of being in wet clothes and she had ignored him! Now all Indrani had said was that she would hear some “story” after  a change of clothes and the girl had agreed.

Both Indrani and the girl seemed to  share some sort of a special bond. Her best friend’s daughter, she was to his wife the child they never had. He had never been very much bothered about not having any children. His work, his books and his conversations with his wife kept him content But he knew that to Indrani it mattered. Hers was a life meant for motherhood! She had tried to compensate by showering her love on their two dogs and three cats. A natural extrovert, she was the most popular person in the  neighbourhood. All the kids living nearby kept dropping in to talk to “Indrani Aunty”. She probably knew more about their lives than their parents! She had the ability to relate to any person at their level. No wonder all her former students still kept in touch with her.

As he looked out of the window again, he saw someone else at the gate. A young man, standing next to a motorbike unmindful of the rain that was drenching him. “What is wrong with young people these days” wondered Dr. Menon as he opened an umbrella and walked towards the gate.

“Yes.. what do you want?” he asked the young man.

“I .. … nothing!” he said keeping his eyes riveted on the upstairs window.

Dr. Menon followed his gaze. He could see his wife and the girl’s silhouette against the dim light upstairs. He looked at the young man again. He looked decent enough. But why was he standing like this here completely exposed to the rain? He would have been better off had he stood under the bus shelter a few yards away!

“Achuyta, call him inside” shouted Indrani opening the upstairs window. Dr. Menon, was surprised ! Did his wife know this young man?  He followed  his wife’s instructions and brought the boy inside! Indrani was waiting in the living room with a towel. “Here dry your hair. Then go upstairs- first room to the left. I will get both of you some coffee” she said with a smile! The young man smiled gratefully as he took off his wet shoes and socks and dried himself.

Dr. Menon was now totally puzzled! He was a retired Professor of Mathematics from the University – a person who was reputed to have an IQ in the genius category. But sometimes, or may be often, he did not understand people like his wife.

“Don’t stand like that with your mouth open. Come and help me make some coffee” she said pulling him towards the kitchen.

“Indu, what is this all about. Who is this fellow? Why have you sent him upstairs like this?” he asked her.

“Patience dear Watson” she said with a laugh, switching on the stove to heat milk.

“Do you remember how you tutored me in maths?” she asked him.

Dr. Achyuta Menon smiled. It was nearly thirty five years ago. He was a research scholar at the university. A shy young man from a small town, he never spoke to any girls. So it was surprising when this Bengali girl Indrani Mukherjee suddenly approached him at the canteen one day and requested his help with her statistics assignment. She was doing her masters in econometrics and was reportedly having a lot of trouble with her statistics concepts. She pleaded with him to help her pass the course. He could not refuse.

Thus began their sessions together. Initially it was at the library. He had come armed with a lot of books but she seemed to have come with just one small notebook. She seemed to be more interested in him and his views on things rather than on the subject in which she was reportedly worried about failing! He found it difficult to concentrate as she kept up a constant chatter about this and that. Soon, others in the library began to complain about it too and  they had to go somewhere else for their classes.

She invited him for a movie. It was some kind of a ghost film. Rather silly, the way Indrani was getting scared of the ghost in the film- a woman in a white sari holding a candle and singing a soulful song. But of course he was thankful for this fear because hadn’t it been the reason for her to hold his hand tightly and then hide her face on his chest!  He remembered even today the first smell of her hair when it had got caught in one of the buttons on his shirt!

He also remembered being accosted one day by a burly young man who claimed to be Indrani’s  cousin asking him why he was roaming around like this with his sister. He had been threatened with dire consequences and asked to stay away from her. He was a bit intimidated by this incident. However, what he was not prepared for was the sudden disappearance of Indrani from the campus for nearly a month after the first year examinations. He later heard from her close friend Lakshmi that Indrani’s family was planning to get her married.

He did not know what had happened to him at that moment. But within two days he found himself sitting in Indrani’s parents house with his mother at his side, asking her father for his daughter’s hand in marriage. For a family that was supposedly planning to get their daughter married forcibly to some Bengali boy, they agreed quite easily and Indrani Mukherjee had become Indrani Menon! She had also passed her master’s degree with flying colours getting a gold medal and going on to do her Ph. D in Econometrics! She was reported to be the best professor dealing with the statistics course in her department until the time she had retired! He also realized later that she seemed to have mastered her fear of darkness and ghosts.

But he was wondering why she was bringing that up now?

“Achyuta, you are fool” she told him with a laugh!

“Thank you. But may I know how you discovered this suddenly today after  thirty five years of marriage?”

“Oh, I knew it within those first few days in the library. Do you seriously think I was impressed by your mastery over maths? I just wanted opportunities to spend time with you..” she said

“Well whatever, it helped you secure good marks in your exams” he said pompously

“Have you ever spoken to anyone who knows about my maths abilities my dear? Even Lakshmi’s daughter sitting upstairs  knows about my phenomenal abilities in the subject. I have never ever secured lower than 100% in it right from my school days” she said giggling.

“You mean….” Dr. Menon asked his mouth falling open!

“Close your mouth. It is an awful habit” she said scolding him.

“But why…how?” asked her husband disbelievingly

“ It is all about strategy my dearest. As a woman, I knew that I had to get an opportunity to be close to you. Since you were so shy with girls, I could only use the story about getting poor marks as the excuse. I wanted to break the stereotype of a girl who waits to be courted .I knew that unless I made some moves, none would be made. But ofcourse, those days it was difficult to come completely out of stereotypes without causing a scandal. So, I had to also behave like a timid girls getting scared of the darkness and ghosts.. My God what a silly film it was remember” she asked laughing!

Dr. Menon also joined in the laughter…! Really, this woman was a schemer..!

“But what does all this have to do with Lakshmi’s daughter and that fellow” he asked still confused.

“ Oh, everything! She had fallen in love with this young man who was used to having girls fall for him. But she was different from the girls such men usually go out with- she is simple, honest and innocent. All I told her was to capitalize on it. You see, most men have their brains partitioned into compartments- there is physical attraction, traditional relationships like marriage and ordinary interactions like friendships. But then you cannot separate them into groups like this..!” said Indrani, pouring out the coffee into the cups.

“But wasn’t it dangerous exposing her to someone like this? What if she had been hurt in the process” asked Dr Menon passing a tray to his wife to put the cups on..

“No Achyuta he would not have. She had told me enough about this boy for me to know that he is basically honest. Honest young men do not assault girls. They also respect real emotion when they see it. Yes, it may worry those who may never have been exposed to it or experienced it before. I just asked her to show him a glimpse of it. The fellow was thrown out of gear.. so he ran away. He has obviously had time to reflect and is now back” she said placing the cups on the tray and getting ready to move upstairs

“No.. I don’t think you should go up now. What if … you know you walk into something..” he said nervously

“Don’t be silly Achyuta.. All that must be over by now. In all probability he is on his knees now proposing to her” she said laughing loudly controlling herself just in time as she saw the young couple walk down the steps holding  hands.

“Aunty.. Uncle we have decided to get married” she said her eyes shining with happiness.

“ But isn’t it sort of sudden” asked Dr. Menon

“No, Uncle I have had almost twelve months to think about it. I am overwhelmed by  her complete trust in me. These twelve months, I have missed her like nothing else !  I was a fool, I did not realize what she was offering me. Girls like her are rare to come by” said the young man

“ Good.. ! But you know when I decided to get married to Aunty it was a sudden decision. I had to act fast or she would have been married to someone else” said Dr. Menon smiling.

“Really Uncle? But Aunty, mummy had told me how you had asked her to tell him a story about being forced to get married to someone else” asked the girl surprised.

“Whattt…?” asked Dr. Menon him mouth popping open once again

“All is fair in love and war” said Indrani with a wink

( Note to readers: I wanted to begin the new year with a “feel good” story. Hope you liked it )

I could feel his eyes boring through my back but I was afraid to turn back…! I had seen him when he was on that queue of guests up there on the dais waiting for his turn to greet the couple. It had given me a start- I had not expected to run into him here of all places. I tried to hide behind one of the pillars in the hall but I guess it was too late! He had obviously seen me. My heart was beating fast. I  did not know what to do. I was desperate to turn back and take a good look at him. It was almost a year since I had met him last..!

A year – I thought in wonder! Had twelve months really passed since I had completed that internship ?

I remembered the first time I had seen him. He was probably the most handsome man I had set my eyes upon- tall, with curly hair , sharp nose , brown eyes with a cleft on his chin. He was supposed to guide me through this internship with the company. I could not believe my luck!

Over the days that I spent with him, I found it more and difficult to concentrate on my work. He was friendly but I was afraid I was falling for him. You see, I had never felt like this for anyone else!

“People with cleft chins are usually big flirts” said Indrani Aunty when I described him to her. She was my mother’s school mate and I was staying with her and Achyutan Uncle  as a paying guest for these three months.

I could not but agree with Aunty when I saw the number of calls that he seemed to be getting- I was sure they were from girl friends because his voice would change and he would move out to a corner and speak in a low voice. I was well and truly envious of these girls who were able to get him to speak to them in that voice …!

It was very funny the way I wanted to spend time with him but was afraid to be alone with him. I wondered why.. So what did I do? I made arrangements with all the people on our floor to join us at the lunch table so that the crowd would give me the confidence that I lacked while discussing non official matters with him.

I saw him one day at the mall with a girl. She was stunning! Tall, with long legs and poker straight hair streaked red and gold. She was throwing back her head and laughing at something he had said. She was wearing a red dress and was carrying a smart little black bag with her. I looked with disgust at my waist long hair drawn into one plait, my  Salwar Kameeze and back pack which carried everything from my computer to a bottle of water..! I was sure I could not compete with these beauties.

It was then that I decided to fix an appointment with a beauty salon to straighten and streak my hair.  When I went back to my room, I asked Indrani Aunty for the yellow pages.

“What do you want to find out about ?” she asked me.

“Aunty I want the number of a beauty salon so that I can streak my hair and straighten it”  I told her

“Are you mad? You have your mother’s beautiful hair and you want to ruin it !” she said scolding me. I was very frustrated! Nobody understood how I felt! I burst into tears sobbing desperately in Aunty’s arms.

“Come on don’t cry. Tell me what happened” she said hugging me..

“I think I am falling in love with someone” I told her “So what is wrong with that? At your age everyone falls in love with someone” she said laughing.

“Oh, aunty you don’t know. He is a Casanova of sorts. I am very afraid I would get hurt if I got too involved with him. You know this saying about playing with fire…” I said.

“A fire is not dangerous if you know how to handle it and manage it properly. A fire is one of the basic elements. It is a source of energy. It gives us warmth and it helps us cook food “ she said enigmatically.

“So what do you think I should do? Throw myself into it?” I asked bitterly.

“No, you learn to manage this fire and master it. Listen to me and do as I tell you” she said

I listened to her for the full two hours that she spoke that night but I was not sure I could do this.

The next day, I walked into office nervously. When he asked me to join him for coffee at 11 AM I did not ask Mrs Rao or Mr. Alva to come with us. I tried fiddling with the coffee machine so that I did not have to look at him. “Here let me get it for you” he said moving in. I was sharply aware of his presence only inches away from me. I nearly dropped the coffee cup as his finger tips touched mine.

Two or three days of coffee breaks like this made me more confident. I was actually listening without falling down when he asked me if I would like to go out with him next Saturday. Where would he take me I wondered.. He had not mentioned if it was to be lunch or dinner. I was nervous about a movie theatre what with the darkness and the close proximity. I was worried what I would speak to him about should we be alone together in a restaurant. And I hoped to god that he would not ask me to come with him to a disco. I did not know how to dance!

Indrani aunty solved the problem for me by suggesting that I should ask to be taken to the carnival. “There will be lots of people around you so you don’t have to worry. A carnival brings out the child in everyone.  You will enjoy yourself” But what about afterwards?  Would he drop me home straight from the carnival I wondered.

Saturday afternoon was a pleasant one. The sun was mild and there was a cool breeze blowing. I remembered Aunty’s instructions as I waited for him to arrive. Instruction no 1- Avoid fitting into stereotypical slots. Instruction no 2- The truth is often difficult to believe and confuses people.  Instruction no 3- Follow your heart.

It was great fun eating ice cream and cotton candy until we came to the giant wheel where I had to enact “scene 1”. I hoped I was convincing enough when I said I was afraid of heights.  But it was when we were on the giant wheel that the “script” went haywire! I was to pretend to be getting scared and huddle in a corner of the seat we were on and finally when we were getting off,  had to manage to tangle my plait on one of his shirt buttons – the idea being to draw attention to my long hair. Just as we were hanging from somewhere high up waiting for the other seats to fill up, I realized that he was wearing a T Shirt without any buttons.. I was now clearly nervous.. I did not know how to improvise on the script. I heard him say “Don’t look down”. “Where do I look then?” I said, still worried about my lines. “Look at me” were the words that changed my life.. I found myself suddenly in his arms and his lips on mine. The wheel started turning and with that raced my heart and my senses. This was someone else- not me or maybe I was dreaming. I wanted this ride to go on endlessly. But I could sense it slowing down.

We got off the wheel . I felt like I was sleep walking. My entire body was tingling and I walked like a zombie with him to the parking lot and got on his bike. I remembered vaguely Auntie’s instruction no 3 – “Follow your heart”.  Well, my heart was obviously following this bike and going into his flat.

I sat in his living room trying to calm myself as he took my hands in his. He was telling me that he was crazy about me! I knew that I was now in a state of mind where I would not refuse him anything – he only needed to ask for it. I could hear Aunty shout Instruction no 2 – the truth being difficult to believe..! So I told him about my love for him. He pulled away worried. Not to be outdone I brought out my trump card- the one about stereotypes!! His confusion gave me the much needed confidence…! I told him everything that I believed about love- thank god for all those romance novels…! He was now looking what can only be called “zapped”. He said he would drop me home. I agreed.

Aunty was insistent that I should continue with this…! “Now is the most crucial part” she said. I was now more confident about this .. so I agreed.

The next two weeks were kind of awkward. I hope no one noticed the way he seemed to be avoiding me..

I completed my assignment and moved on to my first job. After eight months of being posted in another town, I was transferred back to this city to work in the corporate office. I was again staying with Indrani Aunty and Achyuta Uncle.

God only knows how I spent the eight months that I was away from him. I had been given strict instructions not to call him or get in touch with him. But I did find out about him from Mrs Rao and others in the office. I knew when he was promoted and about his trip abroad.

The last four months had been unbearable as I lived in the same town and watched him from afar. I almost ran into him at the carnival when I was on the giant wheel. He was sitting there all alone suspended up in the sky staring out into space. His eyes seemed to meet mine but I quickly covered my face with my dupatta…! I did not want to be caught riding a giant wheel on my own. I remembered that I was supposed to be scared of heights!

I was impatient about making contact with him again. The plan was to surprise him by showing up at Mrs Rao’s grandson’s first birthday next month. She had mentioned that she had invited almost everyone in the office.

But running into him like this at the wedding was most unexpected. I was not ready to face him.. My heart was beating fast. I wanted to slink out before he spoke to me.

I moved slowly around the pillar taking care to stay behind the flower decorations so that he would not notice me moving towards the exit. Just as I was nearing the exit I found myself face to face with him!

I wished he would not do it- hold me like this with his eyes! I tore myself away from them and ran out. It was pouring rain outside. I did not care… I took off my sandals so  I could run faster. My beautiful Kerala sari was drenched. I hailed an autorickshaw and gave him Indrani Aunty’s address. I seriously did not know why I was running away from  him like this when I actually wanted to run in the opposite direction towards him..

(It is not over folks. There is a third perspective to this – THEIRS )

I walked into the wedding reception feeling a bit awkward. I did not know anyone here other than the groom who was a former colleague.

I looked at the queue that was forming to wish the bride and groom. It did not appear to be  too long. So I joined it. I had decided that I would greet them, spend about fifteen minutes sitting around and then make it straight to the dining hall before leaving the place.

It was as I was shaking his hands that I saw her. I was initially not very sure if it was indeed her because I had never before had the occasion to see her in a sari. But as I walked down from the dais, I was convinced that it was her! I pulled up a chair and sat down in a corner observing her – the thousand watt smile, the waist long hair, the dancing eyes and the same animated way of talking. In a crowd full of women wearing bright coloured saris with sequins and zari she stood out by virtue of her sheer simplicity in a white Kerala sari with a gold border!

It was this simplicity that had initially attracted  me when I had met her  about a year ago. Was it only a year I wondered,,,!

She was an intern who had come in to work in our company. I was assigned to supervise her and guide her through her project.

She was so different from all the  girls who I usually went around with. She was very confident- but her confidence came from her knowledge and ability to deal with a situation rather than from superficial things like good looks! She was thorough with analyzing any information that was provided to her and was quick to see the interpretations. She spoke her mind and was not afraid of anything or anyone! People in our department just loved her! She also had a great sense of humour and one could hear her laughter ringing through the corridors. She reached out to almost everyone in the three months that she spent with us!

I was very intrigued by her – she was like this new specimen in my lab full of girls. She never tried to consciously do anything to attract me but I found myself being drawn to her more and more every day. It was initially a few minutes of coffee break taken together , then lunch breaks and often a lift to her paying guest accommodation. It was quite frustrating to  get her alone. She seemed to be always surrounded by people. At lunch, it was this group that gravitated to her table that made any form of personal conversation almost next to impossible. In the evenings, she again seemed to be with someone or the group with some plan for a movie or shopping expedition.

We were therefore forced to hold our conversations during our work time..! But what could one talk about other than the weather and maybe  the latest movie with Mr. Alva nearby or Mrs Rao listening in at the next cabin?

Finally, I decided to ask her out on a date. Where could I take her I wondered? With her kind of confidence she would be as comfortable at Kamath Hotel as in a disco. But somehow, she did not seem like a disco person…However she solved the problem for me by suggesting we could go to the carnival that was being held nearby. So, it was the carnival where we were alone together –but surrounded once again by a crowd…!  I was mildly irritated by the situation – though not for very long. It was a pleasure to see her enjoying herself there. She was like a child trying out all the games and eating cotton candy .. Soon my annoyance gave way and I began to enjoy myself as much as she did.

I swear, I did not plan what happened sometime later but happen it did! I wanted to go on the giant wheel. She was afraid of heights she said. But I convinced her to give it a try. The wheel moved slowly up as people started getting on it and soon we were suspended high above the ground waiting for the various seats to get filled. The operator was taking his own time letting people get in. While I enjoyed the fantastic view from our position there she started getting scared.

“Don’t look down. ” I said . “But where should I look then?” she complained nervously. “Look at me I said” turning her head towards me… She looked.. I looked and then I don’t know what happened I suddenly found myself drawing her towards me and before we knew what, we were kissing. The wheel turned around as my senses churned. I don’t know how long it was before we drew apart.. the wheel was slowing down.

We stepped out of the giant wheel and walked around the fair quietly holding hands now.. there did not seem to be  need for any further conversation. We walked silently to the parking lot. I started my bike and she hopped on to the pillion. I drove to my flat. My flat mate who was a pilot in a commercial airline was away on a flight.

So, there we were finally alone..! How many girls I had brought there during the last two years…but somehow I did not realize at that time that this was different. She sat down quietly in my living room. I sat opposite looking at her. Her eyes were down cast and she appeared to be thinking about something.

“What are you thinking?” I asked her.

“ Oh nothing” she said with a small smile. I went up to her took her hand in mine. She did not withdraw it. “ You know I am crazy about you” I told her. She nodded. I told her about how I had spent all my waking moments in the past one month thinking about her. She listened quietly .. For such a talkative person, she was strangely silent.

“Why are you  not saying anything” I asked

“What is there to say?” she said “ I love you and trust you completely. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

It was as if I was suddenly shaken out of  a dream “What do you mean? I am not ready for marriage” I said. “Did I say marriage? Marriage is only a social formality. I do not believe in it. I believe in something higher- love. I am in love with you and want to share my life with yours” she said with a smile.

She was not making any sense now..! I understood physical attraction and social relationships like marriage. But this was something else altogether…! Was she suggesting that we live together I asked her. She said she did not know. She just wanted to be with me all her life. She spoke about how true love transcended social norms and brought body and soul together.

I was well and truly confused. I looked at her. I knew whatever move I made now she would not resist. I saw the trust in her eyes and I suddenly was afraid..! The same innocence that had charmed me now seemed to be intimidating me. I wished she was one of those girls that I had fallen into bed with and then walked away continuing to be friends until each of us found someone else. I could deal with them and the physical attraction their bodies held for me.  I also understood the girls who were clear about marriage being their objective in any relationship that they shared with a guy. And ofcourse I was familiar with girls who would have been outraged had I even held their hand.

But this girl did not fit into any of these categories. She was offering me her love but I was strangely afraid of it..! I did not know why…! I was the person now who seemed to be having the confidence problem. She sat there supremely confident waiting for me to say/do something.

However nothing was said and nothing happened between us either. I dropped her off at her PG accommodation after sometime.

Her internship was coming to a close and after the next two weeks, I did not see her again. She seemed to have changed her phone number

But thoughts about her continued to haunt me. I sometimes heard Mrs Rao in the next cabin speak on her mobile with her. I wanted to ask her what her new number was but I don’t know, there was something that seemed to be holding me back. I knew there were some others in the office who maintained contact with her but I felt too awkward asking them about her.

I tried to forget her by having one relationship after another.. living up to my cassanova image! Somehow, nothing seemed to work.. I was tiered of those sexy bodies and the predictable responses they offered me..! I wanted conversation of an intelligent variety. I have often gone to fairs sitting alone on a giant wheel and imagined the feel of her lips beneath mine. Once my imagination ran away with me and I almost saw her on  a another seat in the wheel.

I went to places which she frequented wandering around aimlessly. I was not even sure which town she was in. I wanted to often call the management institute that she was from to find our where she was working but somehow I was afraid that word would get round to her.. I don’t know why it  mattered if she knew I was looking for her. Wasn’t she offering me herself without expectations. So why should it worry me?

I often wondered why I had not proceeded any further that evening – it would have been so easy. But it would have also meant taking advantage of her innocence… I may be a flirt, Cassanova or whatever but I never took advantage of any girl..!

( to be continued)

“Akka, did you find them?  The  two trunks ? Amma made me put them in just before her stroke” said Alamelu who was holding the wobbling ladder on which Aditi was perched.

“Amma can I take a look?” asked Neha

“No Neha, Alamelu lets just forget it…! I am not risking a scorpion or a snake bite just so I can find two steel trunks full of I don’t know what…” grumbled Aditi stepping down from the ladder.

Neha appeared visibly disappointed. All the sense of adventure that her twelve year old mind had conjured up in its mind seemed to have collapsed with this decision of her mother’s. Alamelu looked annoyed. One of the old family retainers, she was used to getting her way with the family. This Aditi akka was as stubborn as Ayya!

Aditi, washed her hands in the old bathroom in the back. It was a wonder that water still flowed through the taps. No one had visited this house after Amma’s stroke two years ago.

Aditi, had rushed in from Delhi and had taken her mother with her once the doctors had given the clearance.  Her brother as usual, had only communicated over phone telling her the million reasons about how he could not make it- how Sheila would be upset if he had to cut short their holiday etc. But what else could she expect from him? Why was she even surprised that he had not shown up for the funeral last week?

She wiped her hands on a towel and went out into the backyard. The mango tree with its foliage made the backyard look almost eerie in the twilight. She remembered it as a small sapling that Amma had planted many summers ago.

Amma, her unconventional mother… A lady who was far ahead of her times. With Appa being employed on a ship, Amma had almost single handedly brought up both Aditi and Santosh. A person of interesting contradictions, she played western classical music on her violin after reciting her shlokas in the morning. Though she had only completed schooling till her tenth standard in Tamil, she could read Jane Austen and the Bronte sisters in the original English version. She could still remember Amma in her Chungudi sarees  sitting at the carved desk by the window writing in her leather bound notebook. The muted light from the lamp shade on the table cast a beautiful glow around the room and of course around Amma’s face as she wrote.

It was strange but she had no such images of Appa. His was a fleeting presence in her life. He was there for vacations and all that she could remember of those visits were the goodies and the perfumes that he brought with him. There was a lot of laughter and fun while he was there but when he was gone it was as thought things went back to being “normal”-studies, homework, regulated outings – all of which formed the comfort zone that she called her life!

CRAASSSSH !! Aditi started at the sound and ran inside the house. Neha lay on the floor crying noisily. The ladder had collapsed and two steel trunks lay opened on the floor nearby.

“Really.. Neha you idiot! What did you think you were doing? Just imagine if one of those trunks had landed on your head” shouted Aditi picking up her daughter.

“Akka please don’t shout at paapa like this. She is scared” said Alamelu hugging the child.

“Oh please.. both of you.. leave me alone. All I need is a hysterical woman and a naughty child now. Alamelu please take her  away from here!” said Aditi beginning to sneeze with the dust that suddenly seemed to have collected around the room.

“Come with me my child… come” said Alamelu taking Neha away from the room.

Aditi looked at the contents strewn on the floor.. yellowed pieces of paper, old black and white photographs that had become unstuck from the album, some music sheets, old   first editions of some English novels , pieces of coloured embroidery threads, an old wooden cooking set….! So much of clutter!!! “ Why did Amma collect so much of nonsense” she thought as she started picking them up and arranging them back inside the trunk.

Just as she was putting back the things  she found something lying inside the trunk- a thick leather bound notebook. She picked it up and opened a page randomly. What was this? Amma’s journal?

She wiped the dust off the covers and looked at the first page. It seemed to be a story. “ Padmini’s decision” was the name.

Aditi looked at it curiously….the story was written in English. The writing was very fancy- cursive writing that  women of her mother’s generation adopted while writing something in “fair”.

It was getting on in the evening. Alamelu was sleeping over for the night. So Aditi decided to do something about dinner soon. There was no chance that the kitchen was functional. She decided to order something from Saravana Bhavan in the next street. They had a take away.

She was really annoyed with Santosh for leaving her alone like this to deal with the house. Her husband Sudhir was too busy to join her and so here she was alone in the house of her childhood with just Neha and Alamelu for company. Without Amma’s presence the house did not seem like a home.. it seemed like what had become – an empty shell of a happy past.

10.00 PM….Neha was asleep and Alamelu was snoring away on the living room sofa.  Aditi sat at Amma’s desk with the leather bound notebook opened in front of her. The table  lamp cast a similar  glow.. but this time was the daughter whose face it illuminated.

“ Padmini’s decision” was an interesting story. Actually, it was more than a story.. not long enough to be a novel but not short as in a short story. It was the story of a girl from an orthodox  family who had dreams of higher studies, travelling the world and meeting people. But life had different things in store for her as her parents got her married at eighteen. She had what many of her generation would have termed a good life. A good mother in law who did not interfere in her life and a life that catered to both necessities and luxuries… Yet there seemed to be an unfulfilled yearning somewhere for something unknown.

As Aditi read on .. she began to feel uneasy. Was it her imagination or did it have a parallel in Amma’s  own life? Was Amma discontented with her life? If she was, then she had never let on..! Aditi forced her attention back to the story.

“ Why.. why have you come back to me now” asked Padmini of Rajan. Fifty years of marriage and they had not spent more than fifty nights together.  Rajan seemed to chase some unknown dream as he travelled the world.. like Sindbad the sailor. His books and poetry had brought him fame but not happiness. It had taken him fifty years to realize that as he stood at the doorstep of his ancestral house waiting for Padmini to admit him inside.

Aditi, looked at the next page and the next .. all blank! What happened next? She went back to the trunks and rummaged inside – no there was nothing ! Amma had obviously left the story unfinished.. for some unknown reason…!

Aditi thought for a moment before she took out her pen and started writing

“ What gives you the right to come back to me in your old age when you left me alone to cope with the stress of life in my youth” asked Padmini

 Rajan hung his head in shame.  “ I also had dreams . Just as I left them aside when I became a wife, I would have expected you to do the same. But marriage has never been known to bind a man the way it binds a woman” said Padmini bitterly.

 “Padmini, let us forget the past and begin life together” pleaded Rajan.

 “What life? The one that you have spent enjoying alone or the one that I have forsaken. Go Away. Stranger.. I don’t know who you are” said Padmini as she closed her door shut..

6 months later

Aditi came out of the publisher’s office and got into the car. Sudhir sitting at the driver’s seat raised an eyebrow by way of enquiry.

“They will publish it” she said excitedly..

“But why are you including this along with your other stories. Shouldn’t it go under her name. ”?

“ No Sudhir. It cannot go under her name. It was too close to her life. A life that she  had guarded fiercely despite all the discontentment that appears to have surrounded it. And anyway, Aditi is after all a part of Parvathi so what is the difference? Padmini’s  decision with Aditi’s conclusion is still Parvathi’s story” said Aditi shutting the door as she settled into the passenger seat.

Sudhir stared at this wife in wonder. This woman would never cease to surprise him. He only hoped that Aditi’s decision had done justice to Parvathi’s creativity!

Seat number 35 was on the side- one berth which opened up into two in the sitting position! She put her bag down under the seat and opened the curtain on the window. The seat opposite which was the other half of the berth was empty- to be occupied by another RAC passenger ! She wished she had made the reservation earlier. But then these events had happened so suddenly ..! She closed her eyes, exhausted putting up her feet on the seat in front.

“Excuse me could you please lift your foot off my seat” he asked politely.

Sneha opened her eyes with a start to find a young man standing opposite her with a back pack.

“Sorry..! I didn’t realize it” she said quickly removing her foot from the opposite seat as he pushed his back pack under it!

“Its okay..” he said with a smile.

“Going to Bangalore?” he asked . She nodded and went back to looking out of the window.

“Are you also on a RAC ticket? “ he asked

“ At the moment yes. Hope it will get confirmed along the way” she said

“ Yeah. Keep hoping.. it is a long weekend “ he said with a laugh that showed up as a dimple on his left cheek.

She smiled shyly at him.  “Hi I am Ravi” he said extending his hand.

“Sneha” she said shaking it.

“So where are you from- Chennai or Bangalore” he asked taking off his shoes and making himself comfortable on his seat.

“Bangalore. I work here in Chennai. What about you?” she asked

“Neither. I am from Pune. I work in Chennai” he said with a grin.

Sneha looked at him with interest. There was something very charming about him- despite the tousled hair and the general air of untidiness!

The train started and Sneha went back to looking out of the window. “ I think you have feline vision. You are able to see in  darkness” he asked after about ten minutes!

Sneha could not help laughing aloud…! This guy was too much! Talk about attention seeking behaviour…!

“ Look, it is only about eight hours to Bangalore and given the fact that neither of us is going to get a confirmed berth, why not be civil to each other and engage in some conversation?” he asked her

Sneha smiled at him and asked “Okay tell me what do you want to talk about? “

“Oh anything..! Tell me what do you do?” he asked her

“I work for a newspaper” she said

“And I work for a IT company” he said

“What takes you to Bangalore” she asked

“Work. And you?” he replied

“A family function. But tell me why are you working on a weekend” she retorted.

“ I will be staying with a friend over the weekend. I have work on Monday” he replied taking out his iPOD from his back pack

“Do you like  Kishore Kumar? “ he asked her.      “Well… I don’t usually listen much to Hindi film music” she replied.

“Then you should.. Here listen to this song” he said thrusting an earphone at her while he plugged the other into his.

“Nice melody. What do the words mean?” she asked    “ Dil kya kare jab kisi se , kisi ko pyar ho jaye- it means what can the heart do when when someone falls in love with another? “ he explained.

One song, then another..and then yet another.. Ravi  explained the lyrics to her. She took out that novel she was reading from her bag and showed it to him. He wanted to know what it was all about. She told him the story. She told him the story of another novel by the same author

The ticket examiner came and went. Neither of them asked whether their ticket would be confirmed.

Their co passengers  began settling in for the night. Lights were switched off and silence was slowly settling in the coach.

“ Look at the moon” he said in a whisper drawing the curtains away from his window.

“ Why are you whispering? “ she asked

“ Because I don’t want to disturb these people” he said waving his hands around the coach.

She began to giggle. It was quite funny-  this whispering.  He said something again in a whisper. She moved herself closer to him straining to hear it against the background of the rattling sound of the  train.

Their faces were now inches apart..! He moved slowly removing her glasses and brushing away the strand of hair away from her face .

She knew what was coming next.. but why was she so surprised when it happened?  He drew her face closer settling his lips on hers. She closed her eyes savouring the moment.

“Why .. ?” she began saying something.

“Shhhhh. Don’t talk. Don’t say anything” he whispered pulling her into his arms and drawing the curtain next to  the berth cocooning them  in privacy. Sneha could not believe she was allowing this to happen to her!  But then was she a passive participant she wondered? She did not know why but there was something that was making her do these mad things. It was so unlike herself!

Sneha, looked at him again. Who was this Ravi?  She never even spoke to strangers.

He in turn looked at her with eyes filled with love. He had known when he walked into the coach that this was HER…! He had gone through twenty nine years of his life knowing that he would find HER some day! It was just surprising that it had to be like this on a train. Life certainly held its surprises. One got something when on least expected it.

The train whistled through the night .. Katpadi, Jolarpet, Salem.. Ravi and Sneha held on to each other .. No words were necessary now. No whispers. Their  heart beats said it all.

Sneha closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep. Ravi looked at her sleeping form.. Chemistry like this was very rare. It needed no words to connect. He felt very protective about her. He felt honoured by the way she trusted him enough to rest her head on his shoulder while she slept. He shifted himself around on the seat so that she could be more comfortable. Sneha muttered something in her sleep and cuddled up to him.

The moon slowly gave way to the rising sun..

6.00 AM – the next morning

“Coffee.. coffee…!” shouted a  vendor

She quickly got up and looked out of the window. The train was nearing Bangalore cantonment.  She looked at the opposite seat- it was empty! She looked under the seat. The backpack was also gone!

She walked out of the coach towards the door. No.. he was not there either. She went to the other end of the coach.. no sign of him !  The train stopped at Bangalore Cantonment station. She ran out towards the door scanning the platform for a young man in a blue T shirt with tousled hair….

The train started from Cantonment.. Sneha sat down in the seat dejected! Where was he? Did she dream it all?

The crowd was moving towards the door. The train had reached Bangalore city station. Sneha picked up her bag from under the seat and made her way to the door.

She got down all the while looking around the platform for that familiar form.

“Hello Sneha…thank god you were able to make it!.” said her father taking her bag from her hand.

Sneha looked back at the train once more. The milling crowd at the station made it very difficult to see much…!

She followed her father to the car. He was talking “We have to get home quickly. You need time to get ready. They are all here”

Sneha sighed coming back to reality. Today was her engagement. The muhurtam was fixed for  9.00AM. “They” were her fiance and his family

As her father started the car she took one last look at the empty train standing on the platform and closed her eyes with a sigh

A little further away, in the pre paid auto stand ,a young man in a blue T shirt with tousled hair watched wistfully  as a slightly built girl with waist long hair and glasses get into a white Santro with an elderly gentleman.  An auto drove up to him. The person behind him in the queue nudged him out of his thoughts.

“Where to sir?” asked the auto driver

” National Institute of Mental health and neurological sciences” said Ravi as he got into it.. He looked at his watch. It was 6 .30 AM – a good five hours before his surgery!

Dr. Rao, his neurosurgeon had asked him to be positive. Ravi never felt more so!  He had got what he had wanted out of life last night- a few moments with the girl of his dreams — life however short ultimately did give us hope!

Dr. Debashish Ghosh was recommended as a prospective tenant by Usha, Meenakshi’s friend from her music class. . He was a visiting surgeon in a local hospital and was usually in their town for about ten days in a month at a stretch. Usha’s family had consulted the doctor for many ailments and had a very good opinion of him.

Meenakshi met the doctor and found him to be very polite and soft spoken. He agreed readily to the rent proposed by her. He had moved in a week later with a few pieces of furniture  and ten  carton loads  of books!

It was a bit awkward in the initial days. Never having had to play the role of a land lady, Meenakshi did not really know how to interact with him. Should she maintain a distance or be friendly?  But Dr. Ghosh’s lifestyle made it easy for her to adjust. Most of the days when he was in town, he used to leave for work  early in the morning coming back often very late in the night. He usually parked his car in the small lane outside and came in quietly without making a noise opening or closing the gate.

They led separate lives in the same house until the day she sprained her ankle.  Meenakshi was trying to trim a low hanging branch  in the garden when her foot had slipped and she had fallen down spraining her ankle!. She was just wondering how she was going to lift herself up when she suddenly found a pair of strong hands helping her up. It was Dr. Ghosh. He had seen her fall from the balcony upstairs and had come down to help her up. Slowly,  he walked her to her house making her sit on a chair in her verandah before examining her foot.

“Not badly sprained. I will give you some pain killers and wrap a crepe bandage” he said moving around upstairs to get them. Meenakshi thanked him profusely!

Thus began the friendship between the two of them. He would look in every day whenever he was around and spend a few minutes chatting with her. Though it was initially about her health, the weather and other inane things, slowly they began speaking more about themselves. “Call me Deb” was the probably the first thing he said that marked the turning point in their relationship. Well.. if he was okay about her calling him Deb she was okay with him calling her Meena.  It was preferable to “Madam”

Strange -but she did not realize how quickly they had become  friends. Both of them were almost of the same age. He was a bachelor- “! There was a time when my mother used to keep pushing pictures of girls in front of me. I was not interested then because I was building my career. Now  she is gone, there is no one to do that. Anyway,, I am nearly fifty five and well past that stage now”!  he told her one day with a laugh. She in turn told him about how she was married at twenty and how busy life had kept her as a wife and mother until a couple of years back when Cheenu had left her for the other world.

She began to slowly arrange her daily routine around his coming and going. There were other changes too. Four extra idlis at breakfast or three more rotis at dinner. Initially it used to be a hot case that would be waiting for him to take up, later they dispensed with that and began having their meals together at her dining table downstairs.

Meals together lead to discussions. They found that their tastes were almost similar –whether it was in books, music or movies. Both of them loved Hindustani classical music. So it was but a matter of time when he invited her one day for a music recital by Pandit Hariprasad Chaurasia. She was a bit hesitant to accept the request – she had never gone out anywhere with anyone other than her immediate family. But he persisted and she agreed. Somehow, she did not know why but it made her feel young!  The loneliness of middle age that had set in after Cheenu’s death slowly began to lift. She did not have to rely on that yoga class or the music class to fill her time.

She found herself taking more interest around the house and in her self. Probably, for the first time in two years she bought herself a new sari and spent money on a facial in the  beauty parlour nearby.

It was not long before her friends began noticing these changes in Meenakshi. First it was Radhika, who lived down the road. Then it was Usha who felt that Meenakshi’s singing had improved dramatically all of a sudden. “What is this change all about ?” they asked her.

“I cannot understand why this should bother them. Why, do they want me to remain melancholic and sad all the time thinking about what was …” she told Deb one day. He did not answer. But then that was something nice about him. He spoke only when he felt that speaking would make a difference. “He is not like Cheenu talking all the time giving me little opportunity to be heard!” she thought feeling guilty almost immediately for making that comparison.

Fragrance like happiness they say, cannot stay hidden..! But happiness unlike fragrance attracts envy. So it was only a matter of time before tongues began to wag and one fine day, she found her daughter Anita at her door step.

“Hi Anu, what is the reason for this sudden visit?” she asked welcoming her inside. Anita was very curt and short taking in her mother’s appearance and glancing towards the entrance to the upstairs portion once in a while. It was when Ajay joined Anita a couple of days later that Meena began to wonder if it was not something planned.

“Mom what is this that we are hearing about you” said her son almost hours after his arrival. “What have you heard? “ she asked defiantly.

“That you are having an affair with the tenant upstairs” said Anita bitterly “Don’t you care about what people may think?” she  continued. “ Mom, there is something called decent behaviour. I of all people do not have to tell you about it” said Ajay!

Meenakshi was shocked! She could not believe that these were her own children who were talking! They went on and on … this time casting aspersions on Deb’s character. Finally when she could bear it no longer Meenakshi screamed ”Stop”!

“Both of you listen to me!  I have given more than thirty years of my life to you and your father. In fact I had immersed myself so deep in your lives that I had forgotten my own identity. I lived as your mother and your father’s wife and derived my pleasure from that. But can you imagine what it does to a person when the person from whom you derive your identity suddenly leaves you? Anu, you got married and moved to Bombay, Ajay moved on to New Jersey. I lived those days for that one telephone call or letter from both of you. Did you have any time for your mother then? No obviously not. You were busy with your lives. I tried to make myself busy with mine. Between your father and me we had a routine that kept us occupied. But two years ago when your father died,  what was left behind? Nothing but a void!   I suddenly found myself devoid of a life. There was no Anu, Ajay or Cheenu to occupy my life or my time. Believe me when I say this, I did not know what to do with my life. I had been married at twenty to your father and become a mother at twenty one. I don’t know what it is that I want. I spent two years all alone in this house moving from one class to another to keep loneliness at bay. Did it ever strike you then that your mother may need some of your time to help cope with her loneliness? Now that I have found a friend you grudge me that happiness ?”

The rest of the day passed by in a succession of moody silences. Meenakshi was glad that Deb was not here today. She did not want him to see this selfish side to her children. Finally, it was time for them to leave- first Anu and then Ajay…!

Meenakshi was looking forward to some solitude.. She made  tea for herself and waited in the verandah for Deb to arrive. His flight was would have landed an hour ago.  He had asked her again this time before leaving for Kolkata…”Will you marry me”

While she had been unsure about what she should say when he was leaving, she had no such doubts now.

There was no way she was going to tie her life again with another person . She had done that and got nothing out of it except the loss of her identity. She was beginning to discover herself and she did not want to cut it short by becoming Mrs Ghosh.

At fifty four it was okay to be just Meenakshi!

Tanya who was sitting alone at a table in the centre of the shop  was typing out a text message “ It is 6 o’clock now. Do you think he will show up?”

“ Have patience. He will. I know his kind” typed back Maya for whom the message was intended. She showed the message to Rehana who nodded.

Rehana looked around the shop- yes five of the ladies had come as they had promised. This was the grand finale of what Tanya called “Operation ROCKET”.

Tanya, Maya and Rehana had met up last week deciding to do something about ROCKET.  But they did not really know how to go about it.

“Why don’t we comment on his blog telling him what an awful character he is” asked Rehana. But Maya had ruled that out. “ You will be doing exactly what he wants you to do. You will be giving  him the attention that he is craving for”  They tried to  wrack their brains for some other ideas.

It was Tanya who had finally come up with the idea. Rocket , she had found out was from their town. She had offered to contact Rocket asking him to meet her at the coffee shop on Rainbow Mall . “And both of you Rehana Aunty and Maya didi can come and yell at him in person” she had said.

But Maya had said  that though the idea was a good one, in order to embarrass the man, they needed more women to be part of it. So, began the hunt for other women bloggers who had received the attentions of Rocket. They then sorted out the names by location  to see  who were from their town. Between the three of them they used up every network they had and reached out to eight of the ten women from their town who was on Rocket’s “blog hit list”. Of the eight, three had been nervous about the whole thing though they said that they were with the others “in spirit” ( “What is this  in spirit girls? Either they are in or not in it” Rehana had exclaimed in anger)

So, here they were waiting for Mr. Rocket to show up!

The clocked ticked on. It was 6.15 PM now.  Rehana had her eyes glued to the entrance of the shop.! Most of the ladies had a mental image of the man- an all brawn person with a six pack and an empty brain! Rehana’s hands were inside her purse fingering the rolling pin she had brought along.

It was 6.20 PM  when a person walked into the shop. A thin man with  balding hair wearing a a red T shirt and glasses. His eyes scanned the occupants of the shop. He took out his phone and made a call. Tanya’s phone rang. She looked up – so this was Mr. Rocket! A wimp of a guy with a hunch and a twitch in his left eye!

Seven pairs of eyes watched as Tanya waved at Mr. Rocket saying “Come here. I am Tanya”  Just to be sure she asked loudly “Rocket?” He nodded and sat down opposite her.

Sam suddenly felt that he was in the middle of a movie climax. Seven ladies from the two long tables in the corner were getting up and making their way to the young girl’s table.  He watched with interest. He was sure something interesting was about to happen.

“Are you Rocket? I think you wanted to kiss my hands. Here have a go” said Rehana extending her hand which had the rolling pin clasped on it.

“ You creep!  Look at me. I am Maya from “Rhythms and Rhymes”You think that just because I write love poems I am on the look out for a lover? And even if I were, you will be the last person I would consider for that” said Maya closing in on him.

Rocket was now perspiring…

“I am Dr. Parvathi Srinivasan. Head of the department of English at the University. I have read some of your atrocious comments on my blog. Let me tell you, even my worst student writes better English. If you do not know how to write in English you should try blogging in the language that you are most comfortable with. But that I guess would deprive you of the opportunity to meet hep girls right?”

“ I am Dr.  Minoti Patnaik a cosmetic surgeon. Though I have deleted your indecent comments from my blog, I have not forgotten what you had commented on my post on breast reconstruction and its harmful effects!” said another woman from the group.

“ I am Anjana Tripathi, I work for a NGO which deals with harassment faced by women. I am going to report you to police” she said almost pulling Rocket up by his collar.

“Rocket ? I am Dr. Rekha  Kamath an  astrophysicist. I design rockets. If I ever designed something like you I would break it with my foot!!” she said stamping her foot hard on the ground.

“And I am Mini Thomas a mother of two teenage boys. I don’t know what your mother has taught you but if any of my boys misbehaved like this with any woman I would finish him off!”she said bringing her face close to his.

Rocket was clearly shivering now. He looked at the women around him.. He had never expected to be ambushed  like this. He was particularly nervous about the lady with the rolling pin. He looked at Tanya. She raised an eyebrow and smiled at him.

He suddenly got up and pushed his way out of the circle of ladies around his table. Before they could react he had dashed out of the shop!

“ Shall I run and catch him?” asked Tanya. “No let him be.. he has had his lesson” said Rehana sitting down on a chair nearby. Sam went up to them clapping his hands.“Bravo ladies. Next round of coffee comes with my compliments”.

A week later,  there appeared a post entitled “Ladies Special” on eight blogs. Signed by Tanya Gonsalves, Rehana Habib, Maya Bhattacharya, Parvathi Srinivasan, Mini Thomas, Anjana Tripathi, Minoti Patnaik and Rekha  Kamath it dealt with the problems of harassment of women in the virtual world. Each of the blogs had over 500 hits per day and were flooded with comments from women across the world.

Needless to say, there were no comments from a person called Rocket. Tanya, found out later that the blog had been deleted.

If you ever go to the shop “Coffee and More” at the Rainbow Mall, you will find on the wall a picture of the owner Sam, with eight ladies- titled “The brave hearts of Blogosphere” . When you ask him who they are he will most probably smile and tell you “ this is the MORE in the name of my shop”

Rehana had a cookery blog – “ Zaika”  in which she posted her recipes. A true
foodie, she was also a talented cook.  The interesting part of her recipes were that they were easy to follow. She looked through the  comments section – yes, there were  as usual two comments -one from Tanya and another from Maya!

Tanya and Maya were avid followers of Rehana’s  blog. Tanya was a young IT professional who had never thought that she could cook until she had  tried out Rehana’s recipes. Maya was a young homemaker with a  husband who loved to
eat. Rehana’s recipes, according to Maya kept her “marriage alive”.  Over the eight months that “Zaika” had been on blogosphere, a friendship had developed between the three ladies. Rehana enjoyed visiting Tanya’s blog    “Jottings” which was about funny incidents from her work. Some of the things that Tanya wrote made her laugh till her sides ached. She also loved Maya’s poetry blog and admired the depth of the feelings that the words portrayed.  Since they lived in the same town, they had
met up after a few months of blog based friendship. Now, they met almost twice
a month, often for movies or lunches.

For Rehana, blogging was a  hobby that kept her busy in her retired life. With the children now married and settled, she had all the time in the world to indulge in her passion for creativity. Habib, her husband often teased her about it. But he was also glad about the fact that she did not waste her time gossiping with the other ladies in the building  !

Rehana, scanned through the comments section once again.. before logging out.. Wait- what was that? A comment from someone called “ Rocket” said “ I tried out your recipe. It was so yumm. I want to kiss the hand that wrote it!”  She started laughing..! What an ass! Did this Rocket know that she was a fifty seven year old grandmother?

She must share this with Tanya and Maya. She picked up her phone and dialed Maya’s number- the line was busy. So she tried Tanya.

“ Hello Rehana Aunty. Whats up?”  asked Tanya’s cheery voice.

“ You are not going to believe this but someone just commented on my blog saying that he wants to kiss my hand” said Rehana.

“ How do you know it is a He?”  asked Tanya?

“ I am sure no woman will have a blog called Rocket” she said

“ Wait a minute-Rocket did you say? “ asked Tanya.

“ Yes. Do you know this person? “  asked Rehana.

“ You can say that – it is a He alright- one of the biggest pests prowling the net! He keeps emailing me” said Tanya.

“ What! See I told you it is not right to have your email displayed on your profile”  scolded Rehana.

“ Aunty, if my email were not displayed you or Maya didi would not have contacted me. For everything good that happens there are some annoying things that also happen” said Tanya with a laugh

“ But this person Rocket who is he?” asked Rehana. She was extremely protective about Tanya and was now feeling a little concerned.

“ Oh I don’t know. Writes silly reviews about movies. I now delete all his comments” said Tanya dismissively

“ Tanya, you live alone. You have got to be careful. What if he is a psycho?” asked Rehana.

“ Aunty please chill. He is just a disgusting character. We can ignore him. Ofcourse if you want to encourage him considering that he wants to kiss your hands that is another question”  said Tanya giggling.

Rehana smiled and put the phone down. It was surprising how the companionship of a young person could make one feel young.

The phone rang again. This time it was Maya.

“ Rehanaji read your recipe. I am going to try it for dinner”  said Maya. “ Good ! Listen Maya, I am a bit disturbed about Tanya”  said Rehana

“ Why what happened? “ asked Maya “ She is being harassed by a chap on the internet. Someone called Rocket”  said Rehana.

“  Rocket? That idiot!! “ exclaimed Maya. “ Why do you know him?” asked Rehana

“ You can say that! He comments on my blog. Writes some really over the top comments. You know he sent me a friend request on face book”  said Maya angrily

“ So did you accept it?” asked Rehana with interest

“ Ofcourse not! You know there are some men who are just on the net pretending to blog so they can get in touch with women bloggers. They are not interested in what we write. They are only interested in the fact that we are women… You will never see them comment on blogs written by men” Maya said.

Rehana, thought about this conversation seriously. She then began to look up the comments section in her various posts. Her blog was usually frequented by women. She randomly picked out some women and went into their blogs browsing through the different posts. Yes…! There he was Mr. Rocket! Another blog, and there he was again. Another, another and yet another! Out of fifteen comments that she had received from her women followers in her previous post she found  Rocket comment on blogs of nine of them.

It was interesting to read the comments. Most of them were not about the post but more about the writer- “ Oh this is awesome! I really love the way you pen your thoughts. Someday I want to get into your head and see how those thoughts are created” being one. “ Yes, life is like that …sometimes people like us need to come together to discuss these things more closely” being another! And the best one being on Maya’s blog” Maya I am hurt. Why are you not publishing my comments and why are you not visiting my blog” !! What cheek!

“ We need to do something about this fellow” thought Rehana. A mother of two daughters, Rehana had strong feelings about men who harassed women. She was just a beginner in the virtual world and it was shocking for her to realize that the virtual world was just like a street,  bus or a train where men could harass women.  Men stalked women or commented on them lewdly on the road but these men of the virtual world were probably not so crude though the modus operandi was pretty much the same! But the problem was that while on the road, a woman could slap a man for misbehaving, on the net, it was not so easy. One could delete the comments but Rehana was not sure if the blog could be made inaccessible to creeps like this!

“ We have to teach people like this Rocket a lesson!”  thought Rehana as she switched off her computer.

He had materialized one day outside their gate shouting “Seetamma, Seetamma”. Vaidehi had gone out of the house to see what the matter was. He was standing outside her gate looking at her pitifully. She asked him what he wanted. But he seemed unable to tell her anything.  Every few minutes he would look at her and
say “Seetamma”. Finally, she had gone inside the house and brought out some of
the left over rice and sambar on a paper plate and given it to him. He had
taken it from her gratefully, polishing it off quickly in less than five minutes. She then went in and brought out some water in a tumbler and gave it to him. He drank it and extended the tumbler to her indicating that he wanted some more. She had gone in and returned with a bottle of water which he drank thirstily returning the bottle to her.

After  that it had become a pattern. Every now and then he would appear and shout “Seetamma”  and Vaidehi would go inside and get out some food and water for him. Sometimes it would be a cup of tea. He often slept under the shade of the tree outside their gate. During rainy seasons Vaidehi was tempted to bring him inside the house to sleep in the garage but Raghav ,her husband was completely  against it!

Raghav often scolded her for “encouraging”  the “mad man”! “ You don’t know anything about him. He is mentally unstable. He could attack you”  But Vaidehi was sure that this man would not harm anyone. She just prayed that he would not show up when her husband was at home. A peace loving person of calm nature, Vaidehi did not like any arguments.

But then it is difficult to control the movements of a homeless person. He sometimes did come when  Raghav was at home. It used to irritate him no end.  . “And why does he shout out Seetamma?”  he used ask.

“I don’t know. He never says anything else. Probably this is the only word he knows. It might have been the name of someone dear to him-his mother, daughter or sister. So whenever he wants something he shouts out that name” she said by way of explanation.

Vaidehi had tried to contact NGOs working with homeless persons like him but the problem was that there was no way she could tell them when or how long  he would be there so that they could take him to their shelter . Of course, when he was
there, she herself could not take him to the NGO because she could not drive
and she was sure no auto rickshaw driver  would be willing to drive her with
him . And about Raghav agreeing to drive them both … well it was
difficult even to imagine that!

Other than these arguments about the man, life for Vaidehi and Raghav was quite peaceful at “ Shanti Nilayam” . An old house belonging to the 1950s era, it was the only one of its kind in the small lane. But both Vaidehi and Raghav loved the house with its small garden. They refused to sell out to the builders who repeatedly contacted them.

Over the ten years of their marriage  and residence in the house, the old people in
the neighborhood began to slowly leave the locality and this world. Their
children sold the old houses and moved on and away from the area. So what remained on 3^rd cross street was “ Shanti Nilayam and four blocks of
multistoried buildings. A new breed of people seemed to have moved into these
brand new apartments-they moved around in fancy cars and rarely spoke to their neighbors.

It was only 6.30 PM on that day but the cloudy weather and the incessant rain made it look later than it was. Vaidehi, was walking home from the bus stop on the main road. She hurriedly pulled her bag under the shade of her umbrella and walked into the lane. She was a bit nervous. Two of the street lights were not working giving the tree shrouded lane an eerie look. When she reached her gate, she looked inside her bag for the keys to the gate.

Suddenly, she felt someone behind her. “Do not make any sound. Open the gate and walk inside normally” he said. She could feel something cold pressing against her back! Probably a knife… Her fingers trembled as she tried to open the lock. She wished she could somehow take out her phone from the bag and call Raghav.

“ What is taking you so long? Remember any tricks and I will slash your throat” he said.  Vaidehi’s heart was beating fast. If she opened the gate and led him into the house he would use her as hostage and demand money from Raghav. She was sure of that. She was thinking of some way to escape. Suddenly she dropped her bag. It took
him by surprise. She used that split second to start running. He ran behind her
and grabbed her! She was struggling to get away. She tried to scream but he had
his palm over her mouth.

Then she heard it-aROAR! From somewhere she could feel another person jump on her captor and catch him by the head! She looked around and saw her bearded friend. He was kicking the captor. But the other man was stronger. He hit back and the bearded man fell down. Blows were being exchanged. Vaidehi, ran fast out of the lane towards  the main road. She found a traffic constable and grabbed his hand

“ Sir please come with me” she pleaded. “ What is it Amma”. “Sir please please “  she said sobbing. A crowd gathered around her. She took out her phone and
called Raghav” Please Raghav… come soon. There is an emergency situation around
the house” !

People calmed her down and along with the police man she went into the lane. On seeing a crowd appear the assailant jumped across a wall and disappeared.

Vaidehi ran out to the bearded man lying on the road. His head was bleeding and he was groaning with pain. She took his head and put it on her lap. “ Some one please call an ambulance” she said.

It was  7 o’clock when the ambulance arrived. Vaidehi climbed into it cradling the injured man’s head on her lap. Raghav followed in the car.

There was stretcher waiting outside the trauma care department which took the injured man. Vaidehi followed him into casualty. “Madam, please wait outside” said a young doctor closing the door behind him. Vaidehi slumped down on bench nearby closing her eyes in prayer.

“ Madam, could you please fill in this form?” asked a hospital staff giving her a pen and a form.

Vaidehi looked at the form. The first question was “ NAME OFTHE PATIENT” .

She thought for a moment and then filled in “ JATAYU”

( Jatayu is a charachter from the Ramayana- a lesser known hero when compared to Hanuman and the monkeys who helped Ram. Jatayu was a vulture who faught valiantly to help Seeta when she was being kidnapped by Ravana. Unfortunately, he  succumbed to his injuries dying a hero’s death)